Life brings us through all kinds of challenges, triumphs, adversities, etc. The only thing that is constant in any of life’s cycles is that all of them start us on a process.
Most occurrences invoke a process that is easily adaptable, and we barely notice that we’ve shifted ourselves into a new way of functioning. Life drops a pebble in our shoe, we dump it out, replace the shoe and keep on stepping. No sweat. It’s a lot like when daylight savings time starts or ends. When the time shifts and we adjust to it, we sometimes “feel” the effects, but mostly, its psychological and has no significant effects on our daily routines, nor does it affect us physically (although I am never as happy to “spring ahead” as I am when time “falls back”). Time passes so swiftly nowadays, that an hour ahead or behind has no bearing on all that we have going on in our lives.
Some events, however, come at us like a rock and would cause us to evaluate how it will affect our lives – such as retiring from a career, or graduating from school. These life occurrences force us to explore the next steps we’ll take and what new endeavors to undergo. When we face life events like these, it may take us more time to adjust and recalibrate the order of our daily operations and how we move into our next chapters and if we haven’t already, figure out what our next chapters will look like. This is a bit of a “weightier” process due to the fact that there is a shift in our daily norms.
Then we have these seasons where life forces us to pivot. Life-altering pivotal moments come sometimes in the form of marriage, having a child, losing a loved one or even divorce. When life throws us a boulder, processing its effects can be its own process. How do we fill the space? How do we make more space? Am I going to be able to adapt? What does the healing process look like and do I have the tools I need to come out of the process with satisfactory results? Can I move on without bitterness or resentment?
I think about Joshua at Jericho. He was given clear instructions directly from God on how to conquer the city of Jericho. He had a pretty good plan that he began to execute by sending out spies. Seven steps to follow precisely for seven days and on the last day, victory was inevitable. But can you imagine having to carry out a precision plan that included thousands of soldiers needing to be on one accord and flawlessly execute tasks (surrounding the city each day) – remember this – in silence! If you’re familiar with the story, it was only on the 7th day that the soldiers would cry out after hearing the priests blow the trumpets. Imagine having to orchestrate this strategy using thousands of soldiers, a few priests, some trumpets and the covenant. Can Joshua guarantee the soldiers are going to remain quiet from the other side of the city? Did they completely surround Jericho at all? It was a city after all. I’m sure Joshua had to delegate some responsibilities to several dozens of people to properly orchestrate this massive attack!
In the end though - the most important part of any process - he triumphed! And that’s what we should focus on when life rains rocks and boulders on us. What are we doing to secure a positive and satisfactory outcome for everyone in the storm? What is the process to achieve our happy medium after the storm ends? Is the outcome of the situation one I can live peaceably with?
I had to take a short hiatus from writing because I was experiencing what some would call torrential downpours because there were several things happening simultaneously (not necessarily good or bad) in my life as well as loved ones’ lives who have a direct impact on my own life as well. So, Essence was entangled in some stuff, beloved. But when things cause us to ask questions about outcomes and possible changes, we have to be proactive in getting the answers that allow us to make informed decisions. When we have received and can be happy with those answers, we have made progress because we progressed through the process. I’m Essence and I’m encouraging you to progress through your processes.
About the Author
A native of Brooklyn, New York, Robin Holmes began writing creatively at the age of eight. She loved the written word so much; she was deemed a “nerd” by her peers. In the 5th grade, her work was published locally. Her love for writing evolved with poems, rhyming words to lyrics, and original + popular songs.
Although, life forced her to put it on the back burner for some time. She never lost her love for the craft. A single mom at 21 years old, she continued to do the work that was necessary to enforce positive change in her and her daughter's life. After moving Upstate, NY in 2002 she began a new chapter in her life. It was a pivot that changed her.
She had a child, worked with children,
and that introduced her to another passion. Educating prompted her to further HER education. So, she returned to Brooklyn in 2008. After losing her dad in 2010, she later gave birth to her son in 2013. Ms Holmes received her Bachelor of Social Sciences degree in 2017. This helped her rediscover her passion for writing after successfully completing this milestone.
Sadly, after losing a coworker Virginia Monger, coauthor of Nia’s Sick Sense, a series of works were born. She wrote more about adolescents. And because she watched the process of Nia’s creation, and losing someone so dear to her tragically it sparked her passion and drive for her to…
“Get back out there."
The pseudonym “Essence” is a name given to Ms. Holmes by yet another loved one that she lost. She uses it in honor of herself and how much she meant to her.
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